What I have here are the Top Ten greatest Christmas songs ever. Decided by me, of course. Didn't you know? It is I who makes all the final decisions as to what is and isn't a good Christmas song. There are a lot of great ones. There are a lot of shitty ones. After a lot of thinking and many, many years of learning new ones and getting to know the others a bit better, here are the Top Ten Greatest Christmas Songs ever. Decided by me, so you know this is all true.
10. Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas
It's a lovely song, no doubt. Can get to you if done right, which is true of just about any Christmas song. Of course, what really nudged this into the Top Ten was the movie it is from, Meet Me in St. Louis. Sure, it's got Judy Garland in it, but it's also got Margaret O'Brien playing her 5-year-old sister, who fucking out-acts the shit out of Judy, and has a doll graveyard. That's fucking awesome.
9. O Come, All Ye Faithful (Adeste Fideles)
Doesn't that go against anything fundamentalists preach? ROFLMAO! Oh, andfor the Latin.
8. Over the River and Through the Woods
Fun song! And that's what every Christmas for me has been. Going to Grandma's for Christmas. Of course, we've lived with Grandma for the past four and a half years now, so the trip from Germantown to Rockville has now been significantly cut short. Oh, and Cartman and his mom sing this, so there's another thumbs up.
7. Hark! The Herald Angels Sing
This song would so be much higher up on this list if it weren't so fucking hard to play on the piano. Janey Bailey sure needed to practice! This song's tricky. Other than that, it rules. Makes you think of the Charlie Brown Christmas, eh? Hehehe. Oh, and it so had to get onto this list for the sole purpose of having the line "Offspring of a Virgin's womb". Heh.
6. Ding Dong! Merrily on High
Shit, doesn't the name alone merit a Top Ten standing? LOL It's one of at least three Christmas songs with the words "Gloria in excelsis" in it, the other two of course being "Angels We Have Heard on High" and "On This Day, Earth Shall Ring". That's the one where it says "Ideo-o-o, ideo-o-o, ideo, gloria, in excelsis deo." And, unlike DDMoH or AWHHoH, the "gloria" is not held for like 50 fucking measures! I mean, it's one thing to have one Christmas song in which you kill your larynx holding "Gloria" for fucking ever, but two?! Hehehe. But what put DDMoH onto the Top Ten and not the others is that it is sneaky. Yes, it is. You sing the little bit of the verse and then go into the chorus holding the long-ass "Gloria", and you expect that the next line will be "in excelsis deo", right? WRONG! It throws you off. Instead, the lyrics after that are "Hosanna, in excelsis!" Hahaha. Ding Dong! Merrily on High pwns.
5. The Twelve Days of Christmas
You know, some people cringe at the idea of such a "long" song. Yeah, right. It's about as long as any other Christmas song, really. And it is jam-packed full of symbolisms and stuff. I don't remember them all at the moment, but a song like that rules. Partridge, turtle doves, French hens, calling birds, gold rings, geese, swans, milk maids, dancing ladies, leaping lords, pipers, and drummers. Sure are a lot of birds in this song. And it kicks the ass out of that fucking knock-off "Children Go Where I Send Thee".
4. I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day
Holy shit, George W. Bush and I have something in common! We both like this song. Hehehe. I've heard him reference it in at least two of his speeches anyway. It was written during the Civil War. I posted the lyrics in the Cool Quotes thread last year. The third verse goes "And in despair, I bowed my head. 'There is no peace on earth', I said, for hate is strong and mocks the song, of peace on earth good will toward men" but then the fourth verse is "Then pealed the bells, more loud and deep. God is not dead nor doth He sleep. The wrong shall fail; the right, prevail. With peace on earth good will toward men." What can I say? It just speaks to me sometimes.
3. O Christmas Tree
Duh! I'm a Marylander!
2. O Holy Night
It's just such a pretty song, even when sung sloppily by Eric Cartman. The lyrics pretty well cover the concept of this whole thing, what with Christ arriving and why we should care. Hehe. "Long lay the world in sin and error pining, till He appeared and the soul felt is worth." Of course, there's also the ideal, should-be-true part in the third verse: "Truly He taught us to love one another. His law is love and His gospel is peace. Chains shall He break, for the slave is our brother. And in His name, all oppression shall cease." But, because the world is pretty fucked, we instead have all these fucking asshole oppressors trying to use Christ as a reason to oppress people! Grrr! Just not right.
And, the number one greatest Christmas song ever, without a doubt, and perhaps a lot of the world would agree:
1. Silent Night
For a song that some 17th century Austrian priest just kind of threw together at the last minute for a Christmas Eve service, I'd say it has done really well! And a Christmas Eve service is where it thrives. At my church during the night service, after midnight, everyone is given a candle, the lights go out so the whole place is candlelit, and the choir and everyone else sings this song. Hard to describe exactly but it's pretty emotional. Although, the organist and choir director Tad likes to suddenly stop playing the organ right after the words "Shepherd's quake", and let the choir and people just keep going a capella with the "at the sight. Glories stream from heaven afar..." and then he starts playing again. I asked my grandma about this. It reminded me of like when you go to a concert and the band is playing their most popular song and the singer stops singing and lets the crowd just singing along to the music. Heh. Makes sense. Everyone knows Silent Night. But, yeah, when I asked Grandma why he did that (because I also thought he just messed up or something, hehehe), she said it's just what he does during Silent Night: when the line "Shepherd's quake" is sung, he quakes! And what is so emotional and beautiful about this song is, like what I said about O Holy Night, the lyrics pretty well cover the gist of the whole thing. OHN is more the (ideal) concept of Christianity itself, while Silent Night is more about, well, that night. Oh, and the other cool thing about Silent Night is that the title is also a line from its chorus! It adheres to other Christmas songs in that the title is also the first line of the song, but it's still the fucking chorus, dammit!
Up next, Honorable Mentions and, of course, the Bottom Ten Christmas songs ever!
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Originally Posted by SciVille
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